


Whenever You're Ready

by PersonablePerson



Series: The magical Misadventures of Pen Squared [1]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Angst, Emotional Baggage, Family Issues, Headcanon, M/M, Relationship(s), They all need to get their shit together, Unresolved Emotional Tension, What Have I Done, and Evil Author Day, it's complicated - Freeform, so much baggage, they really do love each other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-16
Updated: 2017-02-16
Packaged: 2018-09-24 20:44:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9785387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PersonablePerson/pseuds/PersonablePerson
Summary: A conversation with Hotch brings up thoughts of unresolved issues in Spencer's relationship with his boyfriend.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this theory from way back when that the reason Reid liking JJ made the writers choose to write out his bisexuality is because they'd planned to have him in a relationship with the elusive Sean Hotchner thus explaining his only brief appearance until much later in the series. Far-fetched? meh I'm a dreamer....
> 
> Now this is not what I planned on using for evil author day but it's unfinished so it counts.

It wasn’t always easy dating his bosses brother. Not for the reason most might assume. He and Hotch got along great. But Hotch and his brother often didn’t. Spencer mostly managed to stay out of it. Until the day he was given tickets to a game and a suggestion to take JJ. He’d expected Hotch to smirk maybe suggest it was time to tell the rest of the team. Which is why he was completely taken by surprise when Hotch approached him at the bar on a team night out a few days later with a question.

“Wouldn’t it be easier?”

“Wouldn’t what be easier?” He could tell by the look on Hotch’s face that he’d had another argument with Sean. It's the same look on his face Sean did sometimes when he’d been talking to Aaron before he came over.

“Dating JJ. You’d be a good fit for each other, both smart and driven.”

For the first time Spencer found himself looking at Aaron as Sean’s brother more than his boss . And for the first time he couldn’t hold back the frustration he felt on his boyfriend’s behalf.

“Sean is driven too, maybe not by the same things that you or someone else might see as the right way. He’s driven in a way that whatever he finds interest in he puts his whole heart into because he wants to find his passion. And when does... he’s going to be so great, and you might miss out on seeing it because you only see what you expect to see.”

He could see his words having an impact on Aaron but it seemed Aaron wasn’t quite finished yet.

“What if you’re one of those things? What if he’s only all in for the moment until he realizes it’s not what he wants? Can you still work with me?”

He was about to respond when his phone buzzed in his pocket.

Sean: Still out? Just landed, race you home?

Spencer looked back up but Hotch was already leaving out the door. He didn’t usually stay long on the rare nights he joined the team out. He typed out a quick response and waited a few before he walked out the door.

The entire way to his apartment he tried to drown out the doubt in his mind with thoughts of Sean. The way his smile lights up the room. The way his hands always felt on his bare skin. He shivered already conjuring up images of the way they would stumble into bed together because neither of them are the picture of grace. The way their legs will tangle together. The way they’ll breathe each other’s names in late hellos the same way they’ve done a million times already. The moment of euphoria when all thoughts escape him. The brief moment where his mind and memory blank filled with nothing but contentment.

Before long he’s opening the door ready to greet his boyfriend the way he does every time he finds his way to DC amid his latest venture or the end of another. But instead of the greeting he’s expecting a loud snore draws his attention to the couch. He drops his shoulder bag off to the side and kicks off his shoes. The couch is small but he knows he can manage. Pulling up the end of the throw loosely wrapped around the figure on the sofa he slips in. He props his head up on his arm and just takes in the tousled sight. Another loud snore escapes and he has to choke back a laugh with a grin. His shifting around causes his breathe to blow through Sean’s hair. He startles awake almost pushing Spencer off the couch in the process. He wraps an arm around his waist pulling him in just in time.

“Hey genius, was this really the best idea?”

Spencer throws a leg over top of his. “I’ve had worse ideas.”

Sean laughs pulling him in tighter for a kiss. Stopping just before to take in his eyes and whisper.

“Oh yeah, like what?”

“Telling off your brother for one.”

Sean stiffened and Spencer shifted back a bit.

“What? Why?”

“He suggested something stupid and I corrected him.”

Sean knew there was more to it but he also knew he wasn’t going to get it out of Spencer without a lot of prodding. As much as he worried, tonight he just wanted to be close to his boyfriend after weeks apart. There was something bothering Spencer though, something he wanted to say. He could tell by the look in his eyes. Spencer could never hide what he was really feeling, his eyes always gave him away.

“What’s up babe?”

Spencer curled in close resting his head under Sean’s chin, worrying him.

“We never talk about it.”

“Talk about what?” Sean tried to keep from shaking thinking he knew where this conversation was going.

“You staying. Moving to DC.”

“Part of me wants to. But traveling has been good for me, I don’t know if I-.”

“Hey.” Spencer lifted his head up to pull him into a long kiss. When he pulled back he smiled, trying to dispel the worry in Sean’s eyes.

“It’s okay, whenever you’re ready.”

**Author's Note:**

> The title is inspired by the song "Surrender" by Natalie Taylor


End file.
